AdventureWorld

Deadwood: Amalgamation and Capital

Amalgamation—such an interesting word with several different meanings which all seem apropos for season two of Deadwood.  There’s the obvious connection with the meaning as it’s used in bidness in reference to mergers of two or more companies that results in a combined entity with more power and market domination.  Certainly, that has been a big story-line this season—the Hearst empire buying up all the independent mining operations in an effort to have a total monopoly of the Deadwood gold market …and the alliance of Wolcott and Tolliver to that end.
But then there’s another general meaning that is about combining things into a unified whole which brings to mind how Al has been the driving force behind enlisting key members of the camp to unify for a common goal—protecting the camp from the invading forces of Yankton, Hearst, and whoever’s backing Ms. Whatsherhausen’s play.  And seeing, symbolically, the unification of the community in the great bicCYcle ride—that shared moment of laughter and good-will that we could have never imagined in season one.  In many ways Deadwood has evolved from a camp to a community.
But the most compelling and symbolic connection I feel is to the word as it’s used in mining operations to mean a method of extracting precious metal from ore, specifically by using mercury (a poisonous metal) to form an amalgam.  To me that fits perfectly with a season that has been all about transformation of the characters.  So many of the characters are going through transformations--bringing forth their better selves through painful personal experiences, just as the “poison” extracts the precious metal from the ore.
I had previously written about how I thought Al’s near death experience had changed him for the better.  And Trixie has been forced to face her fears of failing at something other than whoring and is struggling to find her own sense of self-worth.  Alma and Martha had to have an ugly encounter before they could find their better selves and make peace with each other and set about making the best of a bad situation. 
And also there's Martha's lashing out at Seth in a really harsh and hurtful way, which was, arguably, centered on her own perspective with no regard or empathy for his plight (and even used the word poisonous to describe her feelings). But that outburst caused her to looked at her own behavior and recognize that perhaps her poisonous comments were not fully deserved or completely fair.  This allowed her to bring her better self forward, as we saw in this episode as she sought to patch things up with Seth.    
And then there’s Joanie who had to dance with death before she could embrace life. And, of course there’s Mr. Self-Awareness himself, Seth. Well, he’s still a work in progress but I do think we’ll see his transformation also.  And surely the tragedy with William will push him further.
Well, enough literary babble—let me move on to the episode itself.  So many scenes I loved; so hard to know where to start or how to keep this from turning into a tome. I guess the easy way is to just start at the beginning.  I loved the opening scene with Seth and wee William.  Seth even made a joke about the lamp. "Is this the morning, William, do you suppose, the tip of this lamp, like an Indian spear, goes into the top of my head?" And I was very touched by Martha’s response as she listened in on their conversation.  Her look of sad reminiscence really got to me and I starting forgiving her for her hissy fit of the previous evening. (And then by the end of the episode I had totally forgiven her and regained my empathy for her character.)  But Seth wasn’t ready to forgive her yet and made no response to her “goodbye Mr. Bullock.”  He just gave her a look—not a bad look, more of a hhhhhmmmm look.
And I’ll just make a meta-statement about all scenes involving Mose—gack.  And that under-the-table- blowjob may have topped Al’s endless hummer in season one as my least favorite cinematic sexual act in the history of all time. And if Fat Boy (as dubbed by Cy) had said “Fuck yourself and don’t act entitled” one more time I would’ve popped a cap in his ass myself. (I just might have been cheering Wolcott on when he was pushing Mose’s psychological buttons.) And how about Wolcott bitch-slapping Cy with that “On my order, Mr. Tolliver, Lee will burn this building, mutilating you before, during or after as I specify, or when he chooses unless I forbid.”  Dang!
And meanwhile, Alma is signing some papers and trying not to puke.  And Joanie is waking Jane, who hocks up a loogie that had me sharing that urge to puke.  Joanie and Jane chat outside the Chez Ami until it gets nippy on Joanie’s twat and then they go inside.  Later, after cleaning up the bottle that she broke on Wolcott’s head, Joanie asks Jane to move in with her but just the way she said it was adorable, just like a little kid saying why the heck don’cha’ you just stay over. Oh, and those cute little white boots of hers!
Out on the streets, Martha and William come upon Seth and Charlie as they approach the hardware store with lunch.  It’s pretty clear from the sheepish look on Martha’s face that she knows she threw it down too hard the night before with all that repudiating and poisonous talk.  As she walks away from Seth she glances back to try to gage his reaction to her truce-making efforts.  Alma watches from the window without expression.
As Martha lays out the lunch, Seth, Sol, and Ellsworth struggle with the bank’s new safe.  Then Martha drops a bomb by suggesting that Alma should be invited to the bank’s opening.  Seth finally agrees and Ellsworth makes a hasty departure, letting the safe crash to the floor as it drags Seth and Sol with it.  I think there’s a message there.
And poor Ellsworth has to be the one to tell Alma of the invitation which was a great scene.  Alma knits more furiously with every detail.  Ellsworth asks her about his proposal and she feels he’s pushing her and says so.  Then she grabs Sophia and heads to the hardware store.  And we think, as Trixie has stated, that the water’s about to come to a boil between Alma and Martha.
But lo and behold, Martha’s intentions are good and she steps right up and, with considerable sincerity, wishes Alma the best of luck with the bank and compliments her on helping the town in it’s time of crisis.  In the background we see Seth’s eyes bugging out like Buckwheat and looking mighty clenched about the ass. Then there’s a really awkward silence as the camera pans to everyone’s bewildered expressions.  Finally, Alma, looking more bewildered than the rest of them combined, thanks Martha.  Then she says Martha should teach the kids and she (Alma) thinks she really didn’t express that well in their last meeting.  Indeed.
Then Trixie plunks down some gold nuggets as the first depositor and when Sol is filling out the paperwork and says Trixie? she says “the whore” and is immediately embarrassed.  Alma rescues her friend by saying she wants to sign the deposit slip, which Trixie then gleefully waves with a well-earned “huzzah!” .
All this time the action is moving back and forth between the tense scene at the hardware store and the tense scene at the Bella Union and that low strum of music starts playing, low and steady, as the tension mounts, until it climaxes when Mose is shot. 
While all this making up and killing is going on Al is telling Ms. Whatsherhausen that he knows, from a letter that Alma sent, that the cat is out of the proverbial bag about his alliance with Alma.  He proceeds to inform Ms I that she best just take $5,000 from him and get out of town, if she wants to get out alive being his fucking point.  She agrees but says she wants Seth to witness the deal and to escort her safely out of town. Johnny is dispatched to fetch Seth.
At the  livery, the Nigga General and Hostetler are trying to nut a wild horse and as all this is happening that low strumming of background music is rising up again to let us know this isn’t going to turn out well.
Meanwhile, throughout the entire episode William is making us adore him, if we didn’t already.  I personally have loved him since I first laid eyes on him, with his Cow Eyes that could even un-man Al.  Nutall and William are out on the streets having a grand ol’ time talking about the Boneshaker.  Nutall decides to give William a ride and circles around to pick him up.
Then the horse breaks loose and starts running crazy through the thoroughfare. In Al’s office, Seth seems to sense trouble and moves to the window just in time to see the horse run into Hoople-head Steve and wee William.  The scene is as chaotic and confusing as those kinds of tragedies tend to be in Real Life ™. 
Our last shot is of  William lying in the street. And then I realized that I’d just hugged the stuffing right out of the pillow I was squeezing.  Also, I think I heard my heart break a little bit.   

Deadwood: Childish Things

We start with Al proposing to Seth, that since Seth himself is so fucking confused about who he really is and where he stands that perhaps Al should offer him some guidance on the critical annexation issue. He explained to Seth how this moment in time permits interest in one thing only—“Will we of Deadwood be more than targets for assfucking?”
I’d say that’s a pretty compelling and straightforward assessment of the situation.  But Seth is a bit pre-occupied these days with his women problems and didn’t seem to get it. So Al kindly explained that “to not grab ankle is to declare yourself interested”.  That seemed to get his attention, if not full cooperation.
And then we get a look at the gold mining operations and johnsons, johnsons, and more johnsons—Cornish, German and all kinds of johnsons.  Nekkid miners getting hosed off to make sure they’re not sneaking any gold out on their (or in their) persons.  For some reason this scene reminded me of that Seinfield episode--you know, the one about shrinkage.
Yes, the ladies were imploring HBO for their fair share of nekkidness compared to what the male viewers were getting and this is what we got.  Let’s see, the guys get Trixie’s bush and hot lesbians making out in the bathtub and we get shrinkage and gold nuggets being plucked from a guy’s ass.  Need I say more? I think not.
And back at the camp, Al is summoning Ms. Whatsherhausen, although he refers to her as "that cunt with the long moniker". See, it’s not just me with the name.  And later when she arrives they have a sitdown and discuss terms of the deal that Al is pretending to make with her and the Pinkertons. I think and hope he is just pretending but it sure will be interesting to see how he pulls this complicated double-cross off.  I’m not able to figure out how he’s going to do it—it’s fucking imponderable.
And how much do you have to love Ellsworth.   He’s just the sweetest guy ever.   I loved it when he was talking things over with his dog.  When a boulder needs hauling he will haul a boulder. Dang!  Then when he meets with Alma we learn that he has lost a wife and child.  When Alma finally understands that he’s proposing she is so touched that she almost cried ..and so did I, of course. Oh, and when she grabs his arm as he’s leaving and thanks him again—such a great moment between those good friends.
And then another great scene in a very different way was the Smackdown between Alma and Ms. Whatsherhausen.  And let me just say what an outstanding performance by Sarah Paulson. She was truly a marvel in this scene.  I didn’t see her as the Fake Innocent Seductress but she is dead on as the Tough Ass Pinkerton. She was on fire in that scene.  She hit that one right out of the ball park and past the parking lot.  “Alright Ms, Garrett you’ve had your fit of temper, get the fuck back to your room.”  Excellent! Ms. I is the undisputed Smackdown Queen.
Oh dear!  Al talking to that head just has got to go.  It makes Al look crazy and not in a good way.  We like Al crazy like a fox not crazy like Grandma wearing her panties on her head. What happened, did that gleet get backed up all the way to his brain?  Whatever. Anyways, it’s freaking Dan out and, more importantly, it's freaking me out.  So, enough with the head already.
The Great Bicycle (pronounced cy as in Tolliver) Ride was plenty o’ fun.  I love the way it was shot showing everyone smiling and having a good time.  Even that sicko bastard Mr. W was smiling, although him smiling is kinda scary. 
I can hardly bear to watch Jane now that she’s gotten so downright pathetic. I can’t help but remember how great she was when she was saving people’s lives at the Pest Tent.  Poor Charlie can hardly bear it either and goes to talk things over with Wild Bill. A beautiful sad scene.
And doesn’t Martha have her knickers in a twist!  I’m not too sure if her calling on Alma was really all about the teaching or more about scoping out the competition.  At any rate, her little visit did Alma’s head in.  As I pondered on Alma’s reaction I decided that she must have felt threatened by Martha’s proposal that she (Martha) teach the children.  Alma’s probably afraid that Martha might win Sophia’s affection as her teacher and Alma has already lost a loved one to Martha.  Or maybe Oatmeal Martha just annoys her; I get that.
Oh, and back to the twisting of her knickers part, Martha really laid into Seth ..excuse me, I mean Mr. Bullock.  “Do not sacrifice further on my account. I reject the offer, I repudiate it” *stomps up the stairs, stomps back down the stairs* “I find it poisonous!”
Suffice it to say she’s royally pissed at Seth.  He’ll be lucky to even get any oatmeal now and he’ll probably be getting cold meat sammiches (both literally and figuratively) for a long time to come.  And Seth just stood there looking like WTF?
And how about that Joanie Stubbs, clocking Mr. W with that bottle and then ordering his ass out of her establishment.  Maybe our beloved Joanie is going to be fine after all.  She’s got all kinds of moxie.  I hope she gets her whorehouse going again, but this time she should be awfully careful about those Specialty customers ...execept for the Titty Licker, he 's ok.
And a few final, not-too-noteworthy-but-why-let-that-stop-me thoughts:
Poor wee Sophia looked so sad when she was watching Alma stomping off to confront Ms. Whatsherhausen.
Richardson speaks more than two words! 
Gack!  We really don’t need to see the chunks that Jane has blown. *vomit*
Hhhmmm, that seems like a good place to stop.     

Deadwood: E.B. Was Left Out

This episode was classic Deadwood.  Old school.  All the things that made me fall in love with it from that very first episode.  Ethos, pathos, logos—Deadwood-style.  And the humor returned in a big, big way—quips and shots to die for throughout the whole episode.  What a wonderful alternative universe Milch has created (but that’s another post for another time ..unless, of course, I forget which could happen which will most likely happen.)
Kudos to Dayton Callie and Kim Dickens for outstanding performances.  It was so great to see Charlie stepping out of the periphery into the spotlight.  His scene with Joanie was so touching.  “I’m your friend, don’t ever walk past me.”  And Joanie sure could use a friend like Charlie but then couldn’t we all? And I was glad Charlie gave her a hug because I was wanting to give her one myself.  I loved the way Kim Dickens portrayed Joanie’s shock and quiet desperation.  It was palpable.
Also did you notice that when Charlie beat the dog shit out of Mr. W, Mr. W never even lifted a finger to defend himself.  And certainly he could have in the beginning when Charlie first threw him into the street.  But he just laid there waiting for his punishment.  Such a sicko, creepy bastard in so many ways.
The scene with Al and Alma goes on my list of all-time favorites. I’ve been waiting in eager fucking anticipation of those two sharing some screen time.  From beginning to end that scene was fabulous.  Al all dressed up, with his big ol’ cravat was a great start and really made me feel for him trying to fit in with “higher society”.   And E.B . (B stands for bold) fawning over him and, when he found that Al’s suit wasn’t new, saying “perhaps the ruddy health of your complexion may bring out the pattern differently.”  Such a supreme ass-lick.
And then when Al and Alma start their meeting wee Sophia asks if she can leave the room because she’s scared of Al.  Al looks guilty and tries to trivialize her fear of him and Alma nails his ass. 
Alma:  You frighten her.
Al: I have that effect.
Alma: I think specifically it was your plotting against her life.
Excellent! 
The ensuing conversation was delightful and the chemistry between the actors was delicious.  When Al said “Tell that child no hard feelings” I peed my pants laughing.  No hard feelings like they’d just had some little disagreement. Al, you kill me!  Then when Alma asks him what kind of tea he enjoys and he curses (yet again) and demurely puts his fingers to his lips and twists them like a girl going Ooopsie! Let me lock my lips.  Again with the killing me, Al.
The scene with Alma and Seth was painful to watch.  The look on Alma’s face when she opened the door and saw Seth standing there.  My heart just broke right in two.  Yes, I confess, I’m a Seth/Alma shipper, like that’s some big secret.  (Hhhmm, would that make me an Almeth in shipper parlance?)  I wish Martha would have just kept her ass in Michigan but I do like that Cow-Eyed Kid.  Anyways, I love how the scene ended with Seth looking back lovingly at Alma before leaving and saying  “It becomes you.”
And, this episode was just chock full of one of my very favorite Deadwood things—the brilliant use of reaction shots in both obvious and sly, subtle ways.  One of the best was the shot that allowed us to see Seth’s reaction to Trixie’s response when Sol asked if she had any advice for him. It was a coup de comic.  The look on Seth’s face when Trixie answered “Tread lightly he who lives in hope of pussy.” Fucking hi-larious.  Kudos to Timothy for nailing it.
Also, in that same scene I loved the way Trixie called a truce with Seth by telling him he could help things by not being so self-righteous seeing as Moses had already done the heavy lifting, the fucking tablets and so forth.  And a typical Seth response of a very flat “sure”.
So much to say, but alas, carpal tunnel sets in and I must try to wrap up this gush-athon. So I’ll sally fucking forth with parting random thoughts in no particular order…
Yay for Al screwing Tolliver royally at the sit-down.  Tolliver is so condescending to Al that it was good to see Al beat him at his own game.  And Seth looked like he was enjoying it too.
I think Trixie just wants Al to think she doesn’t like it at the hardware store.  That way it makes it seem like she’s only staying to do Al’s spying.  I don’t believe it and I don’t think Al really does either.  But I think Post-Gleet Al might actually want her to be happy even if it means that she leaves him and the Gem.
Al’s Shakespearean soliloquy to the Chief’s Head, like Hamlet to Yorick’s skull.

E.B. to Alma:  A penny for your thoughts.
Alma:  I’m glad to be leaving your company.

Jewel, on Al’s rheumatic walk, “ God, he’s always dragging that fucking leg.”
Johnny on the reason Charlie gave Wolcott a country ass kicking:  “If  Utter’s got corns that might could have touched it off.” 
And finally, the Marketing Genius in me really liked the discussion about the right marketing strategy for Chinese pussy.  Cy’s suggestion that they change their focus from affordability to strangeness led to a new selling spin and a catchy slogan “Chinawoman’s snatch has no match.”  It does have a certain ring to it you have to admit.

Deadwood: Something Very Expensive

I have three things to say about this episode. Creepy. Creepier. Creepiest.  That hoople-head Steve spunking on the horse’s leg was plenty creepy.  The Chinese whores in cages were even creepier.  Mr. W coldly and mechanically slitting the throats of the three whores was one of the creepiest things ever…and that look of horrified recognition on Carrie’s face when she realized she was next.  Terribly disturbing but you just couldn’t look away.  Maybe the only thing that could top it was last season when Cy continued brutally and relentlessly beating a nearly dead Flora—taunting her and bashing her already-crushed head in. Yep, to me that scene was the most disturbing of all. 
So from creepy to confusing I go.  I was a little confused by the conversation between Al and Miss Whatsherhausen.  I think I finally figured it out the third time I watched it.  No, actually I don’t think I figured it out until I read a transcript on another die-hard fan’s site. (I’ll have to remember to add that link when I remember where I found it [roll eyes])  Anyway, once I understood the actual words they were saying I was still at least slightly baffled.  I thought it seemed awfully odd that someone would think that Al could be bought for 50 grand.  …Huh?  Or how about the fact that she'll probably get herself fed to hogs just for bringing Al’s name into this. Did the people who hired her not do their homework? 
The way I understood it he’d have to implicate himself in Brom’s murder in order to frame Alma—so he’d have to “disappear”.  That deal sucks; that’s not big enough money to make Al throw away everything else. WTF?  *sigh* I need some pie.
It was a great scene though, especially watching Silas watch the conversation.  I had come up with a theory to explain how Silas could have been played by Miss Whatsherhausen but I never blogged about it and anyway evidently I was wrong. (Sometimes procrastination works to your advantage.  File that bit o’ wisdom under Life Lessons.)  I had concluded that maybe she had never really fooled him—that he was actually playing her to get information about what she was really up to and for whom. 
But in this episode he seemed really miffed about being tricked and made to look a fool in front of Al so I guess I was wrong.  But it still seems off to me but I’ve already said plenty about that subject in the last post. And for that Bygones!
I’m too tired to be organized in my writing so I’m going into stream-of-consciousness mode.  It was fun to watch Seth throw one of his trademark hissy fits.  He’s such a little bitch sometimes.  I loved when Sol told Seth to drop it and when he wouldn’t Sol said “If you keep it up we’re going to fight and you’ll have to work by yourself while I convalesce”.
I continue to love Johnny—that cherubic face and child-like way he has.  Al also seems to be growing quite fond of Johnny.  I thought it was cute when Johnny was disappointed that Al was sending Dan to Cheyenne for muscle instead of him and Al grabbed his arm and said “I want you close”.  It was like Al didn’t want Johnny’s feelings to be hurt. 
Then when Johnny and Dan were on either side of Al  helping him out to the balcony and Al said “let’s not appear as fucking triplets” I laughed my ass off.  And it was really good to see Al back on the balcony surveying the streets of Deadwood.
Oh dear! The look on Seth’s face when Sol dropped the baby bombshell.  It was definitely an I-just-crapped-my-pants moment.  Hallmark doesn’t have a card for those.  And then he sat catatonic at the dinner-table with Martha and the Cow-Eyed Kid while they blathered on (rather insensitively I might add) about the new schoolmarm.  Also, what’s a marm anyway? Or should I say “anyways” like all the hooples.

Deadwood: Complications

Oh dear! Where to begin… Well, let me just say that this episode had some good stuff in it that I liked but it also had some scenes that felt like filler.  For example, that first scene with Jane and the Nigga’ General to me was neither funny nor central to the storytelling, and was way too long, particularly when you considered the first two points.  Also, enough with the fart jokes, please—you guys can do soooo much better than that.
To continue on with the what I didn’t like so much theme let me add one more thing and I’ll be done.  I’m not digging the tutor/Silas thing on a lot of levels.  Mainly, I just can’t buy that actress as The Irresistible Manipulative Seductress Posing as a Wide-Eyed Innocenct.  I’m not saying that she’s not attractive or talented but, honestly, I don’t think she’s right for this part.  To me, this role calls for someone who can play the fake Innocent while, at the same time, projecting the possibility that underneath that innocence she's got a smoldering sexuality just waiting to be unleashed by her “hero”.  That’s what turns the hero into an idiot who can be duped. (Think Firefly’s Mrs. Reynolds, for a quintessential example.)
I just don’t see that when I watch the scenes with Silas and Miss Isringhausen, especially not enough to convince me that she could make Silas totally lose all judgment.  And how else can you explain how easily he was played by her? I don’t think you can, ergo my discontent.  I mean, come on--Silas has been presented as one of the smartest, most savvy guys in town; falling for the tutor’s little ploy seems totally out of character for him.  It’s like he lost his brain function and keen instincts, ostensibly because his blood flow was being diverted from all other faculties to his Johnson. I never felt that kind of sexual tension between Silas and the tutor, or any heat at all really. So, I’m just not buying it.  And if the lack of sizzle is purposeful, I don’t think it works. So there.
OK, now for the stuff I liked which is way more fun.  I’m really glad to see Al and Seth back to their uneasy alliance.  I like that love/hate relationship and those two have great chemistry in their scenes.  Some classic Al from their scenes: “You got gall coming before me prettier than ever.” (I peed myself laughing at that one)  “Bedridden I know more than you.”  And when passing Seth the bottle of booze “If you wipe the rim of that bottle I’ll knock you out from my present vantage point.”  And then when Al promises Seth that when he recovers he’ll carry his share of the problems, Seth kinda smiles at Al and says “My money’s on you.” Perfect end to a great scene.
I absolutely cannot stand Hugo Jarry and that is probably as it should be.  I think Seth summed it up when he said to Jarry “A beating short of murder might have done you considerable good.
I like the relationship that’s developing between Alma and Trixie.  I always thought they made interesting allies and now that Trixie’s getting out of the whoring perhaps they can develop a real friendship.  Speaking of Trixie, I think the banter and playfulness between her and Sol is excellent—they have a healthy relationship in spite of the past circumstances.  I’m always rooting for them.  And I’m happy to report that Trixie didn’t offer anyone a blow job or “handshake” in the entire episode.  This may be a new record.
I wonder what will happen with Alma’s baby, like will she possibly have a miscarriage and will Ellsworth offer to marry her to protect her honor. (too creepy!)  And does Alma even care about what's "proper" anymore.  I don’t think she cares about the impact on her but she might not want the baby to have to go through life labeled a bastard, since that was a pretty big deal back then. But, also, she’s filthy rich and that can fix such things. 
Some parting thoughts.. Joanie sure does like bathing her whores!  Johnny just gets funnier all the time—the scene that killed me was when he is silently mouthing "Bullock" to Al and then doing some kind of bizarre charade of pointing to a badge and pulling six-shooters when Al says he doesn't know what the  fuck Johnny's trying to communicate.  Johnny is such a hoot!  Also, more Richardson fun in this episode—“I like you.  You’re puuurrdy.”   

Post-Gleet Pondering

I did my Gleet post so fast that I forgot all about the stuff in the previews for the next episode that were worth noting.  Primarily, the shot of Alma barfing her guts out which was most surely intended to make us think she’s preggers.  Oh, dear, would they really do that to us?  Well, I suppose it is realistic—after all she and Seth were shagging like bunnies without the benefit of birth control.
That would certainly freak Seth out—he likes to have things all neatly sorted out.  Alma carrying his child would mess up his nifty little all or nothing solution to their relationship.  I’d say it would give him an (ass) pucker factor of ten.  I’ll refrain from my tight-ass jokes in deference to the regulars who’ve already had to hear them once.
Or perhaps the conniving tutor is poisoning Alma! OK, that’s a long shot and anyway, Alma seems to have a really strong constitution, gastro-intestinally speaking.  Let’s face it--if eating Farnum’s food every day hasn’t killed her there’s probably no poison on earth that could do her in. 
Speaking of the tutor, it also looks like she’s bedding Silas in the upcoming episode.   She’s lounging around in her underwear beckoning someone with a crooked finger and an unmistakable come-hither look.  I assume it’s Silas who's on the receiving end of that come-hithering.  I also hope like hell it is Silas since that would mean nekkid Silas for me and Annika! 
Also, I know that the tutor actually has a name but I just couldn’t be arsed to look it up. And by the way David Milch, her name is too fucking hard to say or spell. Please make a note for future reference when introducing new characters.  Keep it simple..  like Crop Ear, for example.   

Deadwood: Requiem for a Gleet

Did Seth and Martha have that early morning “intercourse” or not?  Maybe not, but maybe so—that’s my definitive opinion on the matter.  Really, it’s tough to call because, afterward, she looked less than thrilled and I just can’t fathom how shagging Seth could possibly leave one in anything other than a state of utter rapture. She wasn't exactly exuding a post-coital glow. She also looked kinda sad so she could have been thinking about her dead husband. 
And Seth looked a bit sheepish, which made me wonder if maybe he couldn’t get down to bidness (if you know what I mean and I think you do) because he and his johnson are still pining for Alma.  That could also explain why she was looking kinda sad and that whole rather stilted breakfast scene. But they were finally calling each other by their first names so go figure. [shrug]
Speaking of Alma, I have one thing to say about her goading and bullying E.B. Excellent! I love spunky Alma and I love the scenes with her and Ellsworth.  I also loved how Ellsworth told off Wolcott.  I just can’t stand that Mr. W. or his ‘ho. And I think it’s funny that he’s got the fastest “gun” in the West.
And, of course, we still had to resolve Al’s pee-pee problem.  Thank god that storyline has arced! But I was totally moved by the scenes with Al and his little “family”.  I must admit I got all misty-eyed when Al finally started peeing bloody gleet and everyone piled on his bed hugging him and crying with relief.  It was such a strangely beautiful and affecting moment.  Great shot from above the bed. 
I’m glad they made Al’s character someone who has a lovable side—someone these people feel they would have been lost without.  Theirs may be a strange and sometimes cruel family but it’s held together by love and fierce loyalty.
Also, the Literary Genuis in me wonders if Al’s suffering and near death, followed by the passing of the gleet and stone is meant to be symbolic of a transformation, particularly when I note that the episode is called Requiem for a Gleet. (For those not familiar with the term, gleet has a double meaning as both the inflammation of the urethra and the discharge of mucus and pus that is characteristic of this inflammation. Lovely)  Perhaps this whole thing represents the transformation of nasty vile Al into someone, er .. uh.. less vile and nasty. 
And what’s up with that tutor?!  Never had a drink, my ass.   She’s up to something and she’s definitely something more than a tutor.  Could she be an agent of Mr. Hearst?  Could this whole tutoring gig have been a set-up?  Or could it be that I just watch too much Alias and 24?  Anyway, it got Silas back in the action and for that I’m eternally grateful.  And who can blame her for picking Silas, he’s perfect.  If I was hatching an evil plot that called for seducing someone he’s certainly who I would pick.  And there’s the added benefit of him being so handy with the killing and so forth.

Deadwood: New Money

I suggest an alternate title to this episode:  The One About Al’s Pee-pee.  Poor Al!  He was crying for his mommy, as I’m sure any of us would if we had a pair of tongs stuck up our johnsons (or johnsonettes for that matter).  I did some research because yes, I’m that much of a nerd, and found that bladder stones apparently were more common prior to the 20th century and their treatment generated the production of a number of instruments designed to locate and treat this condition. Bladder stones were often too large to be withdrawn without breaking them up. The tool Doc used was called a lithotrite. It was placed in the bladder in a closed position. When the stone was found, the lithotrite was opened up to crush the stone so it could be removed.
Interesting trivia note:  One of the early lithotomists was a traveling clergyman named Brother John, who operated in the early 18th century.  He is the very same famous Frere Jacques for whom the nursery rhyme was written: "Frere Jacques, Frere Jacques, dormez vous, dormez vous?"  Now you know.
OK, enough about Al’s stones, let’s talk about a different dick, namely the strange Francis Wolcott, or Mr. W., who is evidently a Specialist of the masochistic variety, which is not, at all, a  funny specialty like that of the Titty Licker.  No, Mr. W.  is monumentally creepy.  I’m not sure what that scene with Joanie was all about and I’m not sure that I want to know.  Also, that New York Madame is a nasty plug.
Over at the hardware store just when it looks like Trixie and Sol may be hooking up, Trixie pulls her usual tired shit by suggesting that Sol could be paid for her bookkeeping lessons by “taking it out in cunt”.  Trixie, I have  four words for you-- shut.the.fuck.up.  And then she throws a hissy fit when Sol tells her to cut it out and she says “I wish I was a fucking tree!”  WTF??? 
And, since I can find no logical segue to the subject of Richardson let me just acknowledge that fact and go there anyway.  This episode was like playing Where’s Richardson?—he’s become the Waldo of Deadwood. He's there, lurking in the background in quite a few scenes. David Milch says he couldn’t believe it when he first noticed how funny it was just to have Richardson in a scene, even if he was just standing there being Richardson.  I agree.  And the hilarious way he said “no” like “naaaauuuuoo” to E.B. when E.B. blathered on for an eternity with his whole stormy sea diatribe and then asked Richardson, the repulsive lout, if he understood. And then Richardson scurries out the door in his weird little scuttle.
And finally, random parting thoughts:
I love E.B.’s message to Al:  "Al. If you're not dead and already moldering, I send news to revive you. A fish to rival the fabled Leviathan has swum into our waters. Get well soon and we'll land the cocksucker together."
I like Alma all spunky and pissed off. And, she told that tutor’s ass off royally. 
“Does this hat make my head look big?” Mr. W to E.B.
I missed Silas this episode. Perhaps a little too much.

Deadwood: A Lie Agreed Upon, Part II

The big question in this episode is: Does Seth have a deathwish?  His actions could certainly give you the impression that he does--perhaps only sub-consciously, but his reckless behavior does beg the question. Al pontificates on this possibility while Dolly gives him a hummer.  Trixie remarks that she understands the lure of ending it all but curses Seth for being such a selfish bastard that he’d take others with him.  The others, being a load of folks who have gotten sucked into Seth’s deadly little drama.  She is downright fed up with Seth anyway and calls him a “self-deluding interrupting motherfucker”.
Sol is loaded out the ass on pain-killing opiates—loaded enough to tell Seth off royally.  He really let him have it and even called Seth a cocksucker …and then he continued to say cocksucker over and over because he'd just discovered that it's really fun to say "cocksucker".  We realized that ages ago, of course.
But, of course, when Seth stupidly calls Al out (again!) there’s Sol, dragging his wounded ass out of the bed to go back up his buddy.  And there’s Trixie, backing up Sol.  Trixie was so pissed at Seth that I thought she might just “accidentally” shoot him.  Ooopsie! My trigger-finger slipped! …Who wants a quick blow job?  Trixie really needs to cut that out--offering blow-jobs left and right every time she gets twitchy.
There were so many great scenes in this episode that it’s hard to pick a few favorites but I have to say that I loved the eruption of the tension that had building up between Dan and Silas.  Dan is giving Silas’ cutthroat friend a country ass-kicking and Silas can only stand by and watch, as he looks to Al for permission to stop Dan and Al says no--twice.  Then that dumb-ass Slippery Dan opens his yap and gets twelve-pointed by Silas.  That Slippery Dan just never learns—last week he got Bummer Dan killed and now he got his own self killed.  Also, I wonder why Dan was such a popular name in those days.
Oh dear, and then Al finally decides Dan needs to be stopped so he fires a shot in the air to get his attention and then points the gun at Dan and says “The next one’s to your head, Dan. Do not doubt me.”  Then Dan gets all huffy and runs upstairs where Al later finds him blubbering like a wee girl.  Al assures Dan that he’s still his main man, that “whatever lurks ahead, of grievous abominations and disorder, you and me walk into it together like always.”  Then they spit and shake hands and almost hug but they don’t, of course, because they’re not girly men.
Meanwhile, in another male-bonding moment Seth is telling Charlie about his brother Robert. When Seth gets all misty-eyed and starts choking up Charlie feigns a gas attack and pretends that he needs to walk away to safe farting distance in order to give Seth some privacy while he collects himself.  Such a somber scene …until Jane walks up and shouts “Fuck you two”.  And then she proceeds to tell them a story about a guy who wanted to suck her cock. They are not amused and she could care less.  She perks up, though, when she finds out Seth’s going up against that Limey Cocksucker that she hates.   She can’t wait to grab a gun and back Seth up in Big Showdown Finale.
And, of course, there’s our angst-wracked Seth and Alma, who have to decide what to do about their love thang now that the Bullock family has arrived.  Seth says they must either leave the camp or stop seeing each other.  Later, Alma is horrified to think that he might expect her to leave Sofia behind. I think that nails her decision to break things off with Seth.  Poor Alma!  She’s got some tough sledding ahead of her.
And when Seth finally gets home his wife informs him that she has removed the bundling board that he installed in their bed.  I told you she wouldn’t be going for that no-shagging marriage-of-circumstance that Seth insinuated in his letter.  In case you missed it, Seth, removing that bundling board the very first night is a pretty big hint that she wants to tap that ass.   
Of all the brilliant scenes, I loved the Big Showdown Finale, out in front of the Gem.  Al’s speech to Seth was filled with what seemed like sincere and beneficial advice.  I don’t think Al ever really wanted to kill Seth; he just wanted him to get his head out of his ass.  After Al delivers his speech, Seth’s response is just to ask Al if he found his hat—Seth’s way of saying Bygones!  The scenes with those two are always so delicious.
And finally, in the previews I saw that Garret Dillahunt, who played the character referred to as That Droop-Eyed Cocksucker (and worse), is returning to Deadwood in the role of Francis Wolcott.  I think he might be hooking up with the sexually ambiguous Joanie.    

Deadwood: A Lie Agreed Upon, Part I

Welcome to fucking Deadwood. Compared to the slow build of the first season, the second season of Deadwood has taken off like a rocket.  And what a wild ride it’s going to be! 
First we find out that a bad wind is blowing into Deadwood—the government has already taken over the surrounding counties, appointing outsiders as Commissioners.  Al is mighty pissed to learn that his bribes have failed to deter this dire result.  Al, usually quick to take action, just doesn’t know what to do about these new commissioners.  Dan thinks killing them all is the answer--then “we’ll see how they like being Commissioners after they're dead."  Silas disagrees and makes some really smart comments (that I really couldn’t quite follow) to remind us that he’s the brains and Dan’s the brawn, in case we didn’t remember that story development from last season. 
Meanwhile, Seth and Alma are shagging like crazy over at the hotel. Nekkid Seth, need I say more?  They’re literally bringing down the house, as they bang bits of plaster right off the ceiling, onto the heads of the hapless diners down in Farnum’s absurd restaurant.  (As if eating in that restaurant wasn’t bad enough already.)
But it’s not just lust, it’s LOVE.  In a moment of post-coital squishiness, Seth confesses that he’s an absolute goner for Alma.  He proves this to us all by becoming distracted by her “beautiful toes” when he’s supposed to be stoking the fire.  Alma looks like she just had the shag of a lifetime; she lounges around seductively, showing off her pit hair and trying to get Seth back in the sack by poking him playfully with those tantalizing toes.   
Back at the Gem Al has stepped out on the balcony to ponder the ramifications of these recent developments and gets even more pissed off when he sees telegraph poles going up everywhere.  “Don’t we face enough fucking imponderables?” he snaps …and then he sees the freshly-fucked Seth stride by and he really snaps.  He is so annoyed with Seth for being "cunt-struck" (just think how annoyed he’d be if he had heard about the beautiful toes thing). “In some fairy fucking bubble—him, her snatch, and his stupid fucking badge”. 
Well, it’s all more than Al can bear so he yells down a few insults that set the Big Showdown in motion. Seth has to tend to some sheriff bidness at the No. 10 but when he sorts that out he strides down the street and the music starts a subtle steady strum that continues to build along with the tension.  I must say the use of background music as the tension builds throughout this episode was just superb—it really worked so well.  And, in addition to the music we had the shots cutting back and forth between Silas, Dan, Charley, and Johnny as Seth enters the Gem and goes up the stairs. 
Then Seth confronts Al and we have more brilliant directing with cut-away shots back to the boys downstairs in the bar as the tension continues to build. Then the big fight!  It looked really painful--the fall off the balcony knocked the wind right out of me just watching it. When Silas stops Dan from killing Seth I said Rrrrut rrrro!  You just know that’s going to be trouble down the road.  And would Al really have killed Seth if the Cow-Eyed Kid had not un-manned him?  I wonder.  And I would not be me if I failed to mention that Seth looked awfully hot all bloodied-up and concussed.
And while all this is going on, at the Bella Union Cy is proving that he is, without a doubt, a bona-fide psychopath (hello! like we needed convincing after he bashed in Veronica Mars’ head last season).  Powers Boothe was outstanding in every psychotic-rant scene …and he had a lot.
Well, I could go on and on so let’s see what else I’ve just got to say.  Oh, dear!  The scene when Alma goes to “greet” Seth’s family was so excruciatingly tense that it even made the viewer squirm.  Everyone so ill-at-ease and the awkward silences and the failed attempts to break the tension with humor—delicious! 
I wonder if Seth’s wife has figured out that Seth and Alma have a thang goin’ on.  I think she knows something’s up.  And WTF was up with Seth saying he had mentioned Alma in his letters when clearly he hadn’t.  I didn’t get his intent.
Also, I’m not sure why he asks his wife about that letter he wrote “that has all his thoughts”.  The letter said he was going to be a good husband to her by “looking after her care, comfort and safety”, which is, perhaps, a polite way of letting her know that she’s not required to shag him.  Nice try, Seth.  That might work just fine if you looked like Charley, but not so much when you look like you, you sexy bastard.  Anyway, I saw that look on Your Brother's-Widow-wife's face--the grieving was all over the minute she looked into your unblinking eyes. Trust me on this.  She's like brother?? What brother??   
Also, I loved this line by E.B. to Johnny, as E.B. is trying to get the hell out of the Gem after being mocked by Al.  Johnny is detaining him by asking him a million questions about Sol and Charley’s wounds and E.B. says “Let me suss out that new trim, Johnny, before I earn some added rebuke.”  Classic E.B.
Oh, and I almost forgot—drunken, passed out Jane being startled by the stagecoach, yelling “Cocksuckers” and then promptly passing out again.  It’s good to have Jane back.
And finally, some trivia for you: The actress who plays Sofia's tutor,  Sarah Paulson, is a friend of Annika's (the blogger formerly known as A.)  They were in a theatre group together when she was thirteen.  So there.